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Of course it went to her answering service and I left a bleak message asking her to call me when she had a chance. Pathetic!I called her a couple of times over the next few weeks but she never called back. I stopped by one of her classes but found out she had taken a leave of absence. I was going crazy, fighting off bouts of depression. How could I have been so wrong? I knew she loved me — that's not easy to fake!Finally I went back to the reservation to talk to Aunt Sophie. I asked Henry to sit with us — I had to get this right. She looked at me with a great deal of sadness and gave me a gentle hug. She had never done that before. I started to tell her what had happened but she already seemed to know. She nodded to Henry and seemed to doze in the warm sun shining on the bench.Henry looked at me for a while, somewhat pensively. "Tom, you've heard about sickle cell anemia, right?" Yeah, sure, it's mostly inherited from African ancestors, right?" That's what you hear the most about. It. Ilove men: adore girls. At sixteen I was yet to discover too, my real sexual orientation. When wemet later in our teens, one girl who had been particularly nasty to me whenwe were both children at school together, clearly longed to get her hands downmy cleavage. What joy it was to be adored by her, to deny her, to realise thepower of my beauty and the beauty of my stupendously huge firm breasts in particular??? Why should I not know that I am beautiful? Why should I not be proud of mybeauty? Why should I not dress to show my lovely legs and superbly huge firmbreasts? There is nothing, but nothing in the world as beautiful as a beautifulgirl. A beautiful girl is heaven-on-earth. Why should I not be proud to beliving breathing talking walking heaven? The third jealousy I have always had to overcome, is racism. I have neverever used my charms for the gain I am accused of using them for. And I cannever understand how supposedly liberal minded people can ?sympathise? on theone hand with.
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